Most of all I would think pure thoughts and forget all about the past couple of months and all my depraved and dirty experiences.This strategy of denial helped me get to sleep Thursday night and made me feel great the next day at school. I studied hard in class and even chatted with Melissa a little bit between the classes we shared. It felt good to return to my old ways of behaving-- I was even wearing panties for the first time in weeks-- and I decided that after doing my homework when I got home I would get rid of the Book of Sins and any other evidence of my former, wicked ways. I would burn them, I decided, the book and everything else. It would be like purging my soul of all its wicked sins.First, though, I had to do a load of laundry. When I got home I raced to do just that, bringing down my hamper from my bedroom to the basement. As the washing machine filled with soapy water I dropped in my light colored clothing, one piece at a time, examining each to make sure it would fit. "Steve piped in. "You said that you'd get him in a trial..." I said I'd try. I never said that I would."Steve started flapping his hands, the way he did when he was a kid.When my father used to call him 'Birdman of Alcatraz' until he learnedto keep them welded to his sides. "You said you would. And now youwon't." Steve," I said, moving next to him until he moved away. "I will doeverything I can. But I needed to see him first, see what his chartssaid, what Win... Dr. Kwan had to say. But, he's not a great candidate.He's..."Steve glared at me. Or tried, his eyes showing fear. "I know he's abig fat smoker who deserves to die."Kara put her hand on his. "She never said that." Her eyes told me thatshe thought I did. "He's just saying..." Steve," I said, trying to keep the condescension out of my voice."Trials don't work that way. First off, there's not a You don't justcall someone up and say, 'put my...this person in. There are protocols,rules..." I know what protocols are,.
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